Thursday, December 6, 2007

Advise to prevent divorce

Prevention of a divorce is better than trying to heal the wounds of it. There are 7 good rules to prevent divorce, but before, not after marriage. Jesus taught his disciples to make serious consideration before marriage.
Today young people sometimes live together without being legally married, in fear of a divorce. But they are cheating themselves. Illegal marriages have the same problems, and separation of those equals divorce.
Courage to marry legally and after serious prayers is certainly preferable.

1. If you want a Christian marriage, do not marry a non Christian or a nonconverted formal "believer"
2. If your parents disagree with your choice, do not act against their will, before you have convinced them of the good character of your friend. Two families join together!
3. Never marry someone who drinks alcohol, even only "for fun". Alcohol is the reason for most of the divorces.
4. Watch the behaviour of the parents of your partner, how they treat each other. Later you will be treated like one of them.
5. Are you and your friend able to budget your money? Monetary disorder leads often to divorce.
6. Is your partner honest and sincere? If you cannot fully trust him or her, do not marry.
7. Watch your friend in his or her job, is it done reliably and cooperatively? Marriage is a second job.

Communication and negotiation

Analyses of others are actually expressions of our own needs and values.

Classifying and judging people promote violence.

Do not judge, and you will not be judged. For as you judge others, so you will yourself be judged. Matthew 7:1

We can never make people do anything.

Negotiation hard for your interests does not mean closed to the other side´s point of view. Quite the contrary. You can hardly expect other side to listen to your interests and discuss the options you suggest if you dont take their interests into account and show yourself to be open to their suggestions. Successful negotiation requires being both firm and open.